Mental Health, motherhood

Create Your Own Sunshine

It’s easy to get lost in a bunker of negatives when talking about honest motherhood this shouldn’t be the case, there are lots and lots of positives and moments/days to cherish. It’s true that there’s a smoke screen of perfect families plastered all over social media which can indeed make you feel like you’re failing in some way with your own family life. Let me tell you, you are not! Remember these posts are purely a captured moment in time. Behind the scenes and out of the viewfinder is most likely to be a sea of toys and washing piled high to the eyeballs but that’s not very Instagram-able now is it so you don’t tend to see it! However, whilst I pledge to be open and honest about my mothering experience there are a ton of positives which most certainly outweigh the negatives, I think we should all take some time out of our busy weeks to sit and write down what positives we have experienced in the last month or even just in the last week. We naturally and unintentionally discard good things that happen and dwell on the things that may have gone wrong sending us into a vortex of bad vibes, I’m not speaking for everybody but, I think it’s a pretty common pattern with a lot of people I know I’m the same so, this week I am taking on the challenge set by a lovely follower over on my Instagram page @jodieandfinn to talk about all the positive aspects from the last month, It’s a great idea and more of us should follow suit so here goes.

 

The Month of June

Let’s start with the weather, it’s been glorious and in turn has opened the world up for Dylan to explore. No longer are we stuck indoors with cabin fever desperately hunting down the next bug infested baby groups to attend! I thoroughly enjoyed our day trip to Blenheim Palace walking around the grounds stopping for a mini picnic together it was lovely, to see Dylan point at the ‘Burrs’ or birds to you and me and just enjoy each other’s company away from the clatter and chaos of the construction site at home.

Dylan also learnt to walk in June, I couldn’t be a prouder mummy! I can’t take my eyes off him, I mean I have to make sure he’s not getting into any trouble but, I’m mesmerised by his little ‘drunk man’ walk. The way he waddles up to me, puts his hand out to hold mine to take me along with him around the garden side by side just melts my heart.

I’m forever grateful for Simon’s mum staying over whilst Simon was away for the week, it was a huge help to feed the dogs or take Dylan for an hour, so I could get other bits and bobs done around the house it felt like a real luxury having her there to fall back on!

I managed to start a new book, on my Instagram page I held my hands up and admitted I had never read a Terry Pratchett book before (I know, where have I been in life)?! Now I’m completely addicted to the Discworld novels and love nothing more than to switch off after a long day with my nose stuck firmly in his books.

The month of June saw a turning point with my outlook on life, mothering and myself. I’d been through some tough moments adjusting to motherhood, I’ve opened up and shown you how guilty I felt over on my IGTV channel within the Instagram app. If you haven’t seen it take a look it’s an emotional post which I’m glad I released to the world, the support from all of you has been truly overwhelming. It’s a raw, real time insight into how mum guilt can really knock you for six and mentally wear you down. From that recording of myself stemmed the beginning of the stronger more equipped me to adjust and cope much better with motherhood and in June I really felt strong and back to feeling like me again. My Blog is a sort of therapy in a way, the weight lifts instantly when I sit and type away my worries, troubles or hot topic discussions coupled with the growing community linked through Instagram supporting each other along the way is a mood booster if ever there was one, it works for me anyway. June also brought a personal situation one which makes you stand back and shift your perspective on life. We get so caught up in the hustle and bustle of life that we need to stop, look around us and appreciate every detail surrounding our worlds. I’m talking about everything, the feeling of the breeze on your face, the family and friends in your life, the sound of the birds, the people going about their day, the old lady who sits and feeds the birds in the park and coos at the little babies passing by with their mothers. All these things go unnoticed or are at least, unappreciated most of the time. I stood talking to an elderly couple at the Aldi Checkout about cat food, but it made their day (and mine) to have such a cheery chat regarding the types of food both our cats preferred! Small moments of simple pleasures can add up to a lot, it’s worth slowing the pace down from time to time.

Mess Mess Mess! Most people cringe at the state their child gets into after eating messy dinners or treats, I must be one of the weird ones because I love it! When Dylan gets covered from head to toe in his food I can’t help but smile, whip out the camera and take a picture of the moment, he’s clearly enjoying his food and that makes me happy especially with him being such a fussy eater. It’s the ice cream in the hair, ears and up the nose that gets me the most he’s a complete state by the end of it, all you have to do is take one look at how happy he is with himself to not give a damn that you have a sticky/messy child on your hands plus, bath time is fun so it’s an excuse to dunk him in the tub and play around with the bubbles.

The bedtime hour for both Dylan and I is pure gold. Whatever heartache has happened in the day is instantly resolved in a cuddle on the sofa together watching the good old Cbeebies bed time hour, it’s my personal favourite and totally our thing. If I’m late to the party from quickly tidying up the hurricane of food from dinner Dylan’s face lights up and starts to do a little excited dance when I come to join him!

Lastly, I’ll leave you with the Kitchen Helper Tower. A joint effort made by both myself and my dad for Dylan is a huge game changer in our lives, Dylan’s able to be up high with me in the kitchen or the bathroom and play in a sink full of water which on these hot days is an ‘all hail’ moment helping us both to cool off and get out of the sun for a while. I’m teaching Dylan to wash his hands because he hates me wet wiping them! I’m also brushing his teeth while he’s standing in the helper tower, he can see himself in the mirror too and loves nothing better than to make funny faces and expressions. If you want to make one have a read of my ‘How To’ post linked below.

How To Make A Kitchen Helper Tower

June has been a great month full of positives, of course threaded through that are tougher, harder times which I don’t need to tell you about because this post is about appreciating all the good stuff. I’m glad I’ve been asked to write this post, it’s been lovely to take a moment to remember all the great things that have happened. There are many more but If I told you all the little fleeting moments you’d still be sat reading this tomorrow! If you get a chance, take a moment to remember the good things that have happened, write a few down remind yourself of what made you smile, I might start doing this more often it’s a free mood booster full of tailored personal memories.

xx

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